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We travelled from Paris yesterday and were detained at the border!  It was crazy!  The dude–who was more like a chihuahua looking for a fight—decided we were sketchy because we didn’t know what airline we were flying home 12 days from now which seems forever away.

Obviously, Chihuahua Man has never toured.

There is a spaghetti brain function that starts happening once you’ve traveled to 4 different countries, 8 different citites–played your heart out, talked to a million people, dragged your shit in and out of each venue, then each hotel room–all in 10 days.  Knowing the brand of airline that got me on my Orbitz search when I booked the thing eons ago is not the first thing on my mind.

The other thing is—I’m a dual citizen—so I have a British passport, but presented my US passport, thinking it would somehow look less sketchy since Billie and I were together. I dunno–reference TOUR BRAIN again, this all seems dreamily clear.

There was a really nice man who was in charge of pointing out the free coffee machine in the detainee room, offering us food, and showing us to the bathroom.  Total Ricky Gervais comedien type, working at the border between France and the UK.  He made the situation bearable.

The funniest thing is, the whole time we were in the detainee room, Chihuahua Man was reading my blog!  Testing my story–seeing if it all lined up!  Haha who knows what he read!  HEe HEE it was hard to keep a straight face when, in the “interview”–where his main goal seemed to be to trip me up, he pulled out printed pages from my blog, my website, recounted things he had read!


I love when worlds collide.

And let’s all just fucking pray for people who are trying to flee horrible regimes, or trying to be near their families to have a peaceful life, who are kept in those rooms, treated like shit, turned away, etc. because of the weird and racist rules we have invented to try to maintain borders.

When we got to our friend’s house in London, we ate this for dinner and I wrote a poem.

I’ll post about Paris tomorrow!


We are

cutting up watermelon

after a 4 country journey

detained at the border

Our white privelege,

women scared,

trans unknowing,

crying in the detainee room


Now, finally landed,

sweet juice of passing

made up borders

Phew in our food,

we eat.




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